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Guilty

Lost time

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They say that if a day with your children is spent in a constant flurry of activity – playing, educating, socialising – that it’s a sign that you generally spend too little time with them. The unquenchable urge to cram every conceivable activity into a rare 24 hour slot scheduled with one’s offspring haunts every out-of-home working parent I know.

It’s exhausting just hearing about the parent who, to “make the most of the time” with their child, schedules in swimming lessons, lunches, park visits, shopping, all set to the manic backdrop of singing of half-remembered nursery rhymes and the cursing of those “washable” paints that have stained the majority of the upholstery in the house.

Meeting one of these mothers for coffee can be quite intimidating. Comparing diaries can cause even the most energetic, loving and confident parent to feel like a slovenly scrooge haplessly stunting their baby’s development.

However, it is worth remembering, whilst sipping that latte, that the seemingly all-conquering Alpha work-away-from-home parent is probably trying desperately to appear just so – the alpha & omega. Parents working long hours away from their homes and their babies may use such frantic activity as a kind of emotional self-flagelation. A penance for not being with their loved ones daily means the actions of a normal week are crammed into 24 hours. It is a calculated, yet often sub-conscious effort to make up for that lost time.

Being a work-at-home parent means that one never needs to regret “lost time” working for another. I get to see my baby every day, and she me. Working from home forces the home into the forefront, and work into the background. And before all you workaholics gasp in horror, this does not make for lesser production – rather a more inspired, motivated and compacted output. As the saying goes, “Work smarter, not harder”.

My personal lost time is that of sitting in an air-conditioned box waiting for 5pm to tick round. I am quite happy to give that time a cheery farewell forever. And my baby gets the absolute best of her mummy – no manic schedule required!

Yes, we may not have a diary as jam-packed as other families’, but the relaxed cuddles and giggles we share throughout each day makes up for that a million times over.


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